


The Precipice

by meikuree (rillarev)



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Allegory, Alternate Universe - Mythology, F/F, Translation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-06
Updated: 2021-02-06
Packaged: 2021-03-18 05:20:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,100
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29238207
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/rillarev/pseuds/meikuree
Summary: Atop a lonely precipice at the edge of the world, Annie Leonhart meets a girl.
Relationships: Pieck Finger/Annie Leonhart
Comments: 2
Kudos: 6





	The Precipice

**Author's Note:**

  * A translation of [崖](https://archiveofourown.org/works/28315809) by [TheLunatic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLunatic/pseuds/TheLunatic). 



> Summary and additional tags added by translator.

_I will give you a sharp sword, encircled by an undying fire. I will give you a sturdy shield, protected by seven layers of impenetrable iron. I will give you a pair of unfeeling eyes, so that you may withstand the cover of the elements. I will give you an unyielding heart, so that you may endure the ordeal of loneliness. These walls shall be your cradle as well as your grave, and this cliff your sole station and battleground. I will grant you knowledge, skill, and courage, so that you may win glory, esteem, and a lasting name in history. There is only one thing you must always remember— never, ever to fall in love._

In thirteen years, Annie Leonhart never forgot her father’s injunctions for a second, growing over the years from an ignorant child into a resolute soldier. Now, with a sword in her right hand, and a shield in her left, she stood as she always had upon the cliff’s walls, keeping watch over a freezing landscape that had daubed both heaven and earth into an indistinguishable, ashen blur[[1](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29238207/#note1)]. In thirteen years, not a single enemy had ever invaded, and neither had a single compatriot ever paid a visit. This sheer cliff, this towering rampart, had long been cut off from the rest of the world, and she felt as if she and the cliff were gradually merging into one entity, becoming a faraway symbol.

Her father had given her a keen sword, but he had not told her how to face the enemy. Her father had given her a sturdy shield, but he had not told her about the taste of bloodshed. Her father had given her a pair of unfeeling eyes, yet he had not told her how to comprehend the emptiness behind the wind and snow. Her father had given her an unyielding heart, and yet he had not told her how to endure the weight of loneliness. He had said not to fall in love, but she did not know what love was.

Perched alone upon the cliff tonight, the soldier patrolled the frozen walls with the same vigilance she had always done. The snow drifted down and then piled up without impediment, such that it also pelted her mercilessly, and she minded not this single visitor within the entire universe.

Just then, within the howling wind and snow, she saw an unprecedented sight— a person’s silhouette, a shadowy figure, a tiny black dot, seemingly scaling the precipitous cliff and moving bit by bit in her direction. Annie held her breath; she dared not blink, fearing that it was simply her own hallucination. But that black dot remained even after she had blinked at last, right at the point when she could bear the sting in her eyes no longer. Little by little, she was able to see more clearly that it was in fact a young girl with long black hair.

An enemy? She had no reference for thinking that way. It was only when her sword made a buzzing sound in her hands that she realised her hands were trembling. She dithered for some time and then threw down her sword. That figure was still climbing up with some difficulty in the stormy winter, as if she would fall off the towering cliff with the slightest mistake. Annie was unable to stop herself from grabbing hold of the edge of the wall and leaning her body outwards. The thick snow on her rustled and fell as she moved. _So the snow is cold, after all_ , she thought, _it’s the first time I haven’t felt as cold as the snow._

She kept deathly quiet, as though the slightest noise would disintegrate the illusion into a million pieces. Expectations were always dangerous in the moment just before they became reality. It had never been in her nature to hold any expectations, but something in the way of instinct told her that the taste of disappointment would be unbearable. And so she simply gripped the frozen brick of the wall and tilted her body further outwards. With the shield pressing uncomfortably against her front, it occurred to her for the first time that her body was not stiff or rigid like her shield. She released her grip, and the sturdy shield clattered upon the ground.

The girl was climbing very slowly. Atop the precipitous, blizzard-ravaged cliff, the smallest slip of her hand would spell out her doom. The thought briefly crossed Annie’s mind: _I would be willing to pay any price, for her to be able to climb up here_. It was such an absurd notion that she was taken aback by herself. She knew nothing at all about who this person was, why she had appeared, and what she wanted to do. Nor did she know if this person would be able to successfully reach her, if she would say anything to her, or what would happen between the both of them. It was all an enigma to her, and yet for a moment she had been willing to give everything she had for the girl. But she had long had nothing she could give, for everything that she ever had belonged to this cliff. _Is there still anything at all within me that I can pray with?_ she racked her brains frantically, wishing to weep. _I have kept watch here for thirteen years,_ she now prayed to a deity she knew not the name of, _if I have ever come into possession of anything, if I am worth anything, please take it all from me._

Her father had neither taught her how to pray, nor told her if a god existed in this world. She could but only guess from his few instructions that everyone needed a god. Annie wasn’t certain if she was also a part of this _everyone_ , but she had no time to dwell upon that. 

The girl climbed at last to a point that seemed close enough for her to reach by holding out her hand. Yet, when Annie held out her hand, she discovered there was still a chasm separating the two of them. In this manner, she expended every effort to hold her hand as far as she could, like an unfailing frozen sculpture. There was a moment when the girl climbing the cliff lifted her gaze and became aware of Annie’s existence for the first time, where she let out an expression of utter astonishment. Annie wanted to shout something to her, but she found that she had long forgotten how to speak. It seemed difficult for the girl to speak, inhibited by the inclement conditions, but she smiled brightly at Annie through the heavy wind and snow. Annie’s eyes finally found their use in that moment, and she saw clearly the friendliness in her eyes, and her lively and sweet smile. Inexplicably, she felt something hot sting her eyes. She began trembling uncontrollably; the snow fell from her shoulders, and a few flecks of it touched the tip of the girl’s brows. The other girl held out her hand with difficulty, and strained her body upwards to the best of her ability. At last, she touched Pieck’s cold fingertips.

She pulled the black-haired girl onto the wall effortlessly. But when she saw the girl standing before her, Annie was struck by a brief flash of dizziness. The barrage of its foreign but all-powering sensations now overwhelmed her brain, in a manner that made the girl before her, who was close in age and stature to her, seem like the most miraculous and inexplicable being in the world. If she so much as looked at her for another instant, she would be plunged into a mystical, violent maelstrom. The sensations of pain, joy, excitement, fear, and her beating heart all swiftly overwhelmed her body. It was as if all her cells had been disintegrated and then put back together in the blink of an eye: everything was still the same, everything had been irrevocably transformed. Annie was breathing erratically, unable to say a word. She could see the look of surprise on the other girl’s face, but she seemed to have come to terms with the situation faster than Annie herself. 

“My name is Pieck,” she said, “I’m a traveler.”

Her name, Annie tried hastily to recall her name; yes, she ought to still be able to recall her name, the same name her father had christened her with. But how best to answer— with what movement of her lips and tongue, with what syllables, and with what sort of coordination? Annie stared helplessly at the girl before her. Pieck seemed slightly perplexed at the look of entreaty within Annie’s eyes, and she was now reaching out to grasp Annie’s ice-armoured shoulders and ask: “What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

Annie could not say anything. All she could do, she found, was to raise her hands slowly, and embrace Pieck’s warm body.

“There there, it’s alright,” Pieck said. Annie suspected that Pieck didn’t understand what had just transpired. But she wrapped her arms around Annie still, as if on instinct, and tightened their embrace. It occurred to her that what the other girl needed most right now was warmth and comfort; with a trace of guilt, Annie buried her face in the crook of her neck.

“Can you speak?” she heard Pieck’s kindly voice whisper into her ear.

But she knew not what she ought to say. If she remained silent, would she ever find out if this girl named Pieck was a friend or foe, and what she was after?

“Are you guarding these walls? Why did you cast away your sword and shield?” 

Annie trembled in her arms. Fear suffused every nerve of hers. She was the embodiment of this cliff; she was the protector of this rampart; she was a soldier infused with her father’s highest hopes and loyalty. She ought to use her sword and shield to slaughter every outsider trying in vain to challenge this cliff and this stronghold. She knew that this girl was not her enemy, no matter what. But right now, with the other girl’s warm body in her arms like this, Annie could easily twist her neck or push her off the walls. That was all she had to do to make sure she would remain a sacred idol, a loyal protector, her father’s glory. 

“Have you been here long? It’s so cold here, and you’re shivering, perhaps we should leav—“ 

Annie hurriedly placed a hand over Pieck’s mouth, cutting her off. But her body was still greedily yearning for the warmth of an embrace— and so, for that reason, she turned to press her lips firmly to Pieck’s, bringing the two of them closer together.

_But you must make sure never, ever to fall in love._

Her father’s words slammed into her brain with the force of a sledgehammer. Thus, as if desiring to escape her pain by drinking a lethal dose of anaesthetic, she moved in her haze to kiss Pieck’s lips deliriously. Perhaps Annie had kissed her tender lips swollen; perhaps Annie had bitten her tongue till she drew blood. But all that no longer mattered. She kissed her desperately, as if she wanted to draw forth every inch of warmth she could from her lips. Inadvertently, the both of them fell onto the ground, splattering foam-like snow all over their faces and bodies. Annie continued holding on to her for dear life, and kissing her with all she had. Tears were falling— from whose eyes, Annie couldn’t tell— and they froze into ice upon their cheeks at once, and were then crushed by their rigorous movements. Fear and euphoria were mingling together within her blood. She forgot her father, and she forgot her god. Perhaps Pieck was reciprocating her kiss; perhaps she had been wholly obliterated. Regardless, their lips were melding together, forever inseparable, and the high walls began collapsing in the face of their overwhelming will. Piece by piece, the bricks holding the wall together came loose and fell off the precipice. It happened silently, such that Annie realised neither that her flaming sword was rolling into the abyss, nor that her seven-fold shield had disappeared within the wind and snow. At last, the embracing pair followed suit as well, and fell along with the high walls now breaking apart in succession like the rain. Together, they fell and fell, and in the course of their path, the precipice was transformed into a vast and limitless lover’s bed beneath them.

**Author's Note:**

> Many thanks to [TheLunatic](https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheLunatic/) for writing this story and giving me permission to translate it! If you enjoyed this, please consider leaving kudos/comments for the original author either on this translation or the original work.
> 
> **Translation Footnotes:**
> 
> [[a](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29238207/#return2)] About the title: the word 崖 (yá) has multiple meanings; it is more commonly used to mean ‘a steep cliff’ or a literal ‘precipice’, but it can also refer to a place that is the boundary/edge/periphery of something else. It is also one of the constituent characters in the Chinese words used in the original text for ‘cliff’ (高崖/gāo yá and 悬崖/xuán yá), the setting of this story. The notion of a precipice, both literal and figurative, is hence something of a recurring motif in this story.
> 
> [[1](https://archiveofourown.org/works/29238207/#return1)] There’s a subtle instance of wordplay in the original text related to the words “ashen” and “blur”. The original text reads “一片苍茫” (lit. “a sweeping dimness/haze”). One of the characters in the key term here, 苍茫 (cāng máng), is 苍 (cāng), which notably refers to the colour of ash white, i.e. the colour that pervades the dreary, snow-deluged setting here. The most direct translation for 苍茫 (cāng máng) would have been “an indistinct blur/haze” but I wanted to try and communicate the way the phrase in the original text would have called to mind both the colour and texture of the setting simultaneously, and not just texture, so I added “ashen”.


End file.
